Memories
by Guiltyofbeinginnocent
Summary: Memories from Harry's past resurface when he sees Draco on Platform 9 3/4 while dropping of his son for his first year at Hogwarts.


Memories

He is content. Hand in hand with his wife, Harry Potter watches as his two children run through the crowd ahead of them. Albus Severus is nervous, Harry can tell, about his first day at Hogwarts. Giving Ginny a light squeeze on her hand, he lets her go and catches up with his son.

"Albus Severus, you know that no matter what happens today, your mother and I will love you all the same."

His son smiles brightly up at his father. Harry knew that he had said the right thing as his oldest son started babbling about all the candy that he was going to buy on the train. Harry pats his son on the back and helps him lift his trunk and owl from the trolley. He gives his son a big hug and gives him one last piece of advice.

"Don't be afraid to let a girl know how you feel son, I mean once I told your mother I loved her, we've been together ever since." Ginny smiles at her husband and laughs when her son pretends to gag. She knew that her son wasn't interested in girls yet, but one day he would be. She just hopes that he will find a nice girl, well just any girl that wasn't in Slytherin. She never did get over her aversion to that nasty lot.

Harry is waving to his son as the train pulls away when he meets eyes with someone. Those pale gray eyes instantly send a mixture of emotions coursing through Harry's body. First is shock, followed by a warm glow and then a cold fear. Harry would know those eyes anywhere. They belonged to none other than Draco Malfoy.

Harry knew that Draco had seen him as he seemed frozen to the spot he was standing. His wife next to him seemed to notice his state and brought him back to his senses. As Draco turned to leave, he looked over his shoulder at Harry one more time and something inside of Harry snapped. He bottled up his emotions and was able to hold himself together the whole way back to their small suburban house in Dartford. He shut up his feelings like he used to be shut up in the closet at the Dursley's and they stayed hidden for a while.

Just as he suspected, they would not remain buried and the memories came flooding back to him as he was falling asleep one night. The memories and the emotions that came with them jolted Harry awake. When Ginny asked if he was alright he just told her it was a bad Voldemort dream, and she believed him. Harry had sworn to himself that he would never tell anyone of the things that had happened in his seventh year at Hogwarts. But seeing Malfoy again just resurfaced the memories like they happened only days ago.

Their secret was becoming a burden on the both of them. Harry no longer knew if he could continue this friendship, this relationship with Draco.

It all started one day after potions class. Harry had forgotten his textbook, and when he went back to retrieve it, Malfoy was there. Only he wasn't his usual brooding self. When Harry looked over to him, he realized that he had been crying. Harry's first instinct was to get out of that classroom as fast as he possibly could. But seeing the sad, desperate look in Draco's eyes somehow pulled Harry closer.

"Draco…" Harry cleared his throat. "Umm, are you alright?"

"Yes Potter I'm fine," Draco practically spit the words out.

"Are you sure, I don't mean to be a bother, but you don't look too well."

"Oh and you think you can help do you Potter? What would you know about being a disappointment? I mean you're the Chosen One. You're _The_ Harry Potter. What would you know about failure?" Draco starts to cry again.

"Oh believe me, I know more about it than you think. Imagine everyone having these huge expectations for you, that you can never live up to. Sure I defeated Voldemort when I was young, but that wasn't me. It was my mother, I did nothing."

Draco turns to face Harry, a look of understanding in his eyes. Harry almost feels sorry for him. Almost. "Anyways, Malfoy, I'm sure what you did wasn't that bad. Just move on and focus on something new."

"Thanks for the advice you nit." Harry isn't even surprised when the insult is thrown his way. It's just the way it is between the two rivals. Even though no words are shared on the matter, both of them know that they will not speak a word of this to anyone. Harry won't because then he would have to admit to actually caring about Malfoy, and Malfoy will not share this because he would have to admit to being sensitive.

After this encounter the two adolescents ignored each other more than they usually did. Harry felt like he had crossed some border that had previously existed between the two. He knew that somewhere deep inside him, he actually cared about Malfoy and this made him sick to his stomach. One night he became furious with himself for noticing Malfoy from all the way across the Great Hall. Harry wished he could just hate Malfoy with all of his might, but his conscious would not let him. Deep down, Harry understood how similar they were. Both tormented by their past and terrified of their future.

A couple weeks later in potions class Draco and Harry had both received a detention. Draco for cheating in the making of one of his potions and Harry for falling asleep while Snape was lecturing the class. As soon as Harry heard Draco being told to stay after class his whole body stiffened. He was dreading having to spend any more time with Draco than he already was. Snape took a deep pleasure in making the boys serve their detention together, Harry could tell. On the outside the boys appeared as if they hated each other, but Harry knew that it was something more. They hated the other for a reason beyond their understanding.

Their task was to clean out everyone of the cauldrons before they could leave the dungeons. Snape had charmed all of the cauldrons so they could not be cleaned with magic, just to punish his students further. Harry knew this would take a long time and he decided that they should work together to speed things up.

"Listen Draco, I know this is not ideal, but if we work together then we can get out of here and away from each other faster."

Draco quietly agreed. Harry took to washing out the cauldrons and Draco scrubbed and dried them. After a while Harry looked down at his hands to find them red and raw from the warm water.

"Potter, why don't we switch roles. I'm getting bored down at this end." Harry noticed that Draco had seen what a poor condition his hands were in, but he said nothing. He was thankful for Draco's offer and did not want to ruin it by thanking Malfoy for his kindness.

Once the silence between them became too much to bear, Harry decided to start up a little conversation between them. They started off on easy topics like old defense against the dark arts teachers to the school ghosts and then into more personal topics like family and their friends. Draco made a few snide comments about Ron but Harry decided to ignore it. He knew that they would be stuck here together for at least a few more hours.

When they had finally finished scrubbing the last cauldron Harry went to go collect his belongings. He looked over at Draco to see that his hands were even more raw than Harry's. They were cracked and even bleeding in some places. Harry felt so bad, why hadn't Draco said anything? He went over and stood next to his classmate.

"Draco are you alright?" Harry asked gently. He didn't want to offend him, but he wanted to make sure that he was okay.

"Yeah, 'm fine Potter."

"Here let me help, I know a really good healing spell. It's perfect for these types of things," Harry pulled out his wand in offer.

"I don't know," Draco hesitated, "I guess so, as long I don't grow an extra finger then okay." He held out shaking hands and Harry grabbed one of them tenderly. He muttered "Episkey" and slowly Draco's hand returned to normal. Then Harry repeated the spell on his other hand. Harry's warm hands lingered on Draco's cool ones after the spell had been completed.

Draco slowly looked up and met Harry's eyes. His eyes were not hard or full of hate for Harry as they usually were. What Harry saw in Draco's gleaming gray eyes sent a cold shiver through his spine. He didn't know what was happening between them, but he also knew that he didn't want it to stop. Draco took his other hand and held on tighter to Harry's.

"You know Harry, I don't think I've ever been fair to you. I always just assumed that since you were so famous that you would be cocky and arrogant, but you're not. You're real and that's why everyone likes you." Harry sat there unmoving, but not letting go of Draco.

"And I have been unfair to you. I thought because you were a Slytherin you couldn't be a good person. There is more to you than you let on isn't there Draco." Draco smiled weakly and nodded.

Harry felt Draco's hand on his face. And before he could stop himself, he felt a blush spread across his face.

"You have a little bit of foam on your face." Harry laughed at this and Draco joined in but his hand didn't leave Harry's cheek. His thumb starting caressing Harry's check softly. A million thoughts were running through Harry's mind but the only thing he actually wanted was for Draco to never stop.

It happened slowly. Harry wanted to speed it up but slow it down at the same time. When his lips finally met Draco's all of his worries just disappeared. He felt blissful in a way he never thought possible. It was even more puzzling how his happiness was coming from a boy who he had hated for the past six years of his life.

Lying in bed, with his wife beside him Harry was remembering his time with Draco. After that fateful day where they got over their fears and just trusted their emotions they used every excuse to spend time together. Their main meeting place was the room of requirement that transformed itself into a small, private getaway for the two of them. Just thinking about it brought a smile to Harry lips.

Then came the dark days, when Draco was being influenced more and more by the Dark Lord. It was a strain on their relationship and Draco could no longer hold himself together. It was hard enough hiding this secret, but harder still when Voldemort wanted Harry dead. They fell apart as fast as they came together. After their relationship disintegrated, Draco and Harry could never really bear to be near each other.

In the darkness, Harry was struck with a sudden pain that he had long forgotten. It was the pain of heartbreak, the pain of hope being ripped from your soul. For weeks after Draco and Harry had ended things Harry had felt this pain. And it was only now that Harry realized he had loved Draco. He had loved Draco more than anyone in his life, even more than Ginny. Harry only hoped that Draco didn't resent him for their past. If Harry had one wish, it would be that he and Draco could be together without any lies or secrets. Just the two of them together, with no complications. Harry knew, though, that this would not be possible. What he and Draco felt together was extraordinary but it had died the moment Draco left him, and it could never be regained. Harry lay in bed, haunted by the memories of Draco's piercing gray eyes.


End file.
